Stripping away the rose colored glasses of denial concerning my reality. Getting in touch with truth. Reaching out to others in empathy concerning their reality and their walk to truth.
Thursday, April 26, 2012
still tripping on carpets made by others
There was a man who made carpets. Somewhere along the weaving he'd sneek in a broken thread or two. That way no one would be able to walk across his carpets without tripping. So the unsuspecting customer would get their expensive carpet home and have terrible experiences. Walk, trip, fall; get up... over and over, so they had to call him to come immediately. Once he got there he would secretly mend the broken threads. No more tripping! But what was the point in him doing this? He simply enjoyed tripping people up. He enjoyed knowing his attention was in demand. He loved the urgent phone calls to beg his presence to investigate the problem. It was all fun and games, and he really enjoyed the results.
I like to understand people and why they exhibit the behavior that they do... but this is not worth it. It's like a kid I knew in elementary school. He enjoyed pulling the wings off of insects and watching them suffer. He'd hold his finger over a tiny ant and say: "I am god; you are dead!" Then he'd smash the ant. It made no sense. And I guess my final answer is just that... if it makes no sense... move away from it or them... very far away.
Jotting it all down, giving it some air... releases the stress, and that's nice. So now I think I'll have some chocolate ice cream and put the "I-don't-understand-abuse" thing to rest.
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I guess the carpet man needs the attention, it makes him feel important - so he gets energy from all of this.
ReplyDeleteWhat he should perhaps be doing is trying to make the finest carpets possible and, therefore, get the attention (and praise /importance) that way.
I think we all like to feel important (i.e. loved) by others. It's maybe what abusers are looking for.
Thanks, Mike, as this brings a better perspective to me. Of course the abuser would have the same needs as me, just different levels (perhaps).
ReplyDeleteYes, it seems quite possible to explain my own boundaries and thereby giving the abuser a choice. And should I also be able to accept his/her boundaries, then step by tiny step, we see where it takes us.
I suppose that's really a better solution. In all fairness to myself, I continue to guard my own heart.
Thanks again, Mike :)