Tuesday, September 30, 2014

No one is immune to doubt

Know what you want.
Notice exactly what you’re doing.
Is what you’re doing getting you closer to what you want?
If not, try something else.

Sunday, September 28, 2014

Badlands National Park

You don't know how much sky you're missing until someone takes a photo like this. Way off in the distance the photo reveals city light.

In the days of my youth I would lay out in the backyard, without a blanket - straight on the ground. Shooting stars were better than TV on a Saturday morning.

Excuse me, I have the urge to go shoot out the green city lamp across from my home. Shhh.

A Halting Tale

Fred and his little brother Roger were eager for the joys of Halloween. Today would be their third and final trip into the woods to secure shrooms, nuts, and special leaves. Then off to trade them at the gift shop for the oh-so-coveted Halloween costumes. Indeed a glorious day awaited. (uh-huh)

Roger's scream echoed through the woods, "Fred, oh my, Fred, come see this shroom!!" Fred rolled his eyes as he often did, at his little brother's exaggerated excitement.

Fred jumped back horrified, staring at a THREE foot shroom. Goodness! Roger had a good reason to scream this time. "That's the ugliest shroom I've ever seen, " said Fred.

"Who's an ugly shroom?" replied the shroom. This time Fred screamed. Roger who turned to run tripped on a large tree root, halting his departure. He lay upon the ground arms flailing wildly unable to speak.

"Well, you are! " yelled Fred. Sure he was a bit frightened, but what the heck it was after all just a member of the mushroom family.

Zip-bang-zowie! and the shroom became a lovely little girl. Fred fell back and felt a tinge of overwhelming love for this 'beautimous' creature. Roger who still lay on the ground thought, uh-oh, this is going to be complicated.

"There are so many more treasures to be found in these woods, my woods," said the lovely little shroom, er, girl. "Follow me through that yonder golden light, and I'll show you." Her eyes did that 'batting' thing and Fred was fast upon her heels.

Roger lay on the pile of leaves watching as the girl shroom and brother Fred disappeared into the golden light, "I ain't going; you can't make me!" But the older boy and lovely shroom had already gone beyond Roger's hearing.

The morning of Halloween came, and still Fred was missing. Many searched the woods daily, to no avail. It was then that Roger realized he had a lot of coins from their "trade-ins," and could upgrade(!) his choice of costume. For the first time he hoped they'd find Fred AFTER Halloween. (uh-huh)

The shop was jammed-packed. Many had waited for the last shipment of new stuff before making a final choice. Roger walked up to a wall that displayed a sign: "Magic Manipulating Potions"... "limit three items for all the stuff you collected in the woods... or equivalent coinage, Roger." (Did the wall know his name? No, the manager is also named 'Roger'. Nice try.)

But Roger, our Roger, thought: This might actually be better than a costume. Just think, a magic potion to make the candy store clerk give you all the candy?!! A magic potion to make the bank teller give you all her one dollar bills! And third, a magic potion to make Roger a hero, finding his brother and bringing him home! A huge parade would of course be given in his honor! All the town's kids would give him their Halloween treats... Roger's imagination was endless. "YES SIR, I want to buy the three magic potions!!!"

"Are you sure?" asked the store manager, Roger. He saw the devilish little smile on the small boy's face. Oh yes, he was sure, alright.

Roger was so happy and went home to make a plan. How was it that he heard Fred calling his name? The voice got louder and louder! What in the world, wasn't Fred lost? Had he been found already? No parade for Roger - what?? It was then that Roger awoke from a very sound dream... a halting dream. No magic potions were on his small desk. He'd merely been asleep. Now it was morning and Fred stood over him, calling him awake.

"Come on little brother. Today I need your help on my science project. I can't let that silly Nelly win the prize. She has won for the last two years. So get up. Help me decide what to do for my science project this year."

Roger's deflation of excitement had taxed him so quickly upon awakening. Here was Fred alive, and he Roger hating it. What? Science project? Oh yes... yes... science project. "I know just the thing Fred! Let's go to the woods and collect shrooms. You can analyze them and tell all about their life cycles and such stuff, right?!" Across Roger's face came a devilish smile. Yes... the science project... so there might still be a chance to make a large Halloween haul after all. And still be the brother-finding hero... YES! he ROGER would see it all come true!!! "Muhu-ha-ha-ha!"

"What did you say Roger?" asked Fred.

Saturday, September 27, 2014

Some days are like a dream

You may ask, "what do I mean?" Go ahead, ask.

In a world where there are so many places to go... I am at home most all the time. Health, wealth, and a community that's loads of fun, keep me busy. Busy with what? Busy with trying to communicate to people... just want to reach out and be reached back to. That seems normal. Oh dear, there's the 'n' word. Really, can we know what normal is?

Some people normally dream - every night - in full color! Me? I dream occasionally, and in color, but remembering is not always a given. Oh the scary ones usually hang out and dwell within the recesses of my mind. My personal cure for the baddies is a couple of peanut butter crackers and back to bed. Pronto. Well, unless I simply have to take a look at Facebook, to see if any news is important. Wait, wait, yes!! Someone has posted something really interesting. Might I add a comment? Oh sure, then off to bed.

Normally two hours will pass and that all important news gets filed away in my large cranium. Well, medium-sized will do, right? How could I possibly pass up a few joke postings? After all, the scary dream might still be waiting in the bed for my return.

I suspect Facebook is not really normal; probably not meant for normal people. And ~ probably pure insanity on so many levels. I don't recall there ever being anything like this sight. Wait! Maybe a huge block party where everyone wears their favorite slogan-displaying t-shirt... but that would be the closest. I remember the good old block parties.

I am now staring out my studio window. The green trees of summer have not changed. They stand tall against a pale blue sky. Golden rays of our sun break through allover. One lone tree with a patch of orange leaves captures my attention. Maybe I'll just sit here and dream. Dream of someone gently calling me: "Hey, what the heck is wrong with you? Wake up!"

Like I said, some days are LIKE dreams, but maybe not.

Thanks for reading. DC

Thursday, September 25, 2014


What might next year bring?

The last little dragonfly... maybe it will return next year or maybe it won't. Delicate creatures - you just never know what they encounter. This little guy was small when he arrived in early spring. I just didn't have enough blooms then to keep him hanging around.

About mid-summer I noticed this black and white dragonfly. I'd never seen one like this. Indeed I almost missed seeing it at all because of the wing transparency. It practically faded into the background of my concrete wall. Braver than the blue colored one, I could approach and watch him for a long time. I wonder if I'll get a last glimpse of a black and white one before Autumn really kicks in?

There's another "fly" I once observed. Maybe I should call it a "flyby". It was the briefest, but scariest moment, ("what the heck is that?").  I don't know any details but it happened within a few days of the 2001 September World Trade Center event. Years later I came across it on the Internet; it was called a drone. Haven't seen one since and that's okay with me. 

Are you a nature watcher? Do you like to keep your eyes on the sky? 

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

A New Season?

There must something I can do. When too many days appear the same, I wonder what talent I might still have. I hate the word "disabled". It has a tendency to impress others with the idea that I'm a cast off. That's not the feeling I have; yet things I used to do are challenging, at times impossible. Sadness is the enemy I combat when thinking on the past. Still I'm encouraged that there is something, and I seek it.

People say, "don't look back," and yet the very thing that gave me past happiness might simply need adjustment. I take care not to limit myself in thought. Physically I can push along some days without injuring myself. It's been a matter of knowing when to stop, rest, return to a project. I was diagnosed "disabled" in 1998. Since then I've come to know the things that have to be avoided. Where would I be without common sense?

So I'm exploring every venue that comes to mind. I welcome any thoughts or ideas from others. Hey just throw something out there; you never know.

Here's hoping your day is filled with direction!

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

This Autumn

The days of heat wind down, and even though I enjoyed the summer's events ~  this jacket I wear this morning, reminds me that Autumn has begun.

Yesterday's sunset of blue and peach, a clear revealing of the coming beauty ~  is welcomed as the changes arrive in all splendor.

My life seems to flow as this new Autumn does ~
a time of longing for warm embraces, yet a time of cooling calm.

The land I walk has furnished me with pears and purple grapes ~
a summer treasure that gives way to the soon harvesting of walnuts.

I am blessed, in spite of the trials and tribulations encountered ~
summer slowly morphs into another season,
one I've always loved best ~ Autumn.

The Old Farmer's Almanac:   In 2014, the autumnal equinox brings the fall season to the Northern Hemisphere on: September 22 at 10:29 P.M. EDT. I think I felt it arrive!!

Friday, August 1, 2014

Freedom Through Simplicity

Oh dear, I stare at a blank computer screen, and feel the same anxiety creeping up: what to write? Let's get on with it and try to have some fun in a lesson-learning world. After all when I'm not learning, I repeat the same damn mistakes; like sitting here waiting for the computer to 'give me words'.

My favorite read right now comes from E. Stanley Jones. He writes: "The successes of life are often the simplicities of life." Then he shares a situation of a British Ambassador's wife. She sent a request to reserve a front row seat at one of Mr. Jones' meetings. It was explained that an ambassador's wife should never sit with anyone in front of her. Mr. Jones says, "What a complication to live by!  I could sit anywhere; I was free! Bondage to prestige is bondage." Thank you Mr. Jones!

Writing has been far from my thoughts. The whole Internet world has taken a back seat, being replaced by the love of being in the fresh air. I simply cancelled my reservation for a front row seat by my laptop. I would visit all of my favorite blogs, but even commenting meant my fingers had to touch the keys. I'm not sure if I can adequately explain what I mean... so I'll fore go it. I'm here at this moment and there's something to write.

You might think it was a time for me to 'soul search' and that's workable. A time to invest in the subtle nourishment I get from digging in the garden, certainly helped. Either way or any way, love of something bigger than myself was so 'knocking at my door'. How often I can get caught up in self reliance. In fact my own inadequacy has served a better cup. My path runneth over!

Yesterday a friend and I gathered grapes from an old vine that has returned to life! The grapes are dark purple and are so sweet. Nothing my hands did revived that vine. I munched on a pear from a nearby tree while she plucked grapes from the higher branches. I failed to mention the crazy grape vine was climbing up a tree for more sunlight. There are still lots of clusters to ripen. The pears need another week - hopefully the squirrels will hold off on their attack. They only want the seeds but will destroy a whole pear to get there.

E. Stanley Jones writes about an Indian businessman waiting on a train. (In India there are four classes on trains; first, second, intermediate, and third.) The businessman must wait for trains with first class carriages. Third class means wooden benches and crowds. Mr. Jones is taking one of those. The man replies, "Yes, you can go on it, for you are a religious man. If you go first class it doesn't exalt you; and if you go third class, it doesn't degrade you. You are lifted above distinctions, but I have to keep them up." ("Bondage to prestige is bondage.")

Okay, I don't have the fanciful gardens. I barely write anything more than a simple story of what I live daily. The fact that it's been eight months since my last post tells me I'm living differently. Maybe more simply. Enjoying freedom through simplicity. And for the reader that stops by for a visit... something that frees me - might free you? Or something that frees you -  I can add to my list!!

E. Stanley Jones, The Way, published in 1956