When someone is phoning you every day, demanding explanations for every little thing she ever took wrong; what do you? How do you gently explain that life has been a hard struggle? Maybe there have been things you said, but why wait until now to deal with it?
I’m guessing a cloud has lifted from her mind. I’m guessing that she needs closure.
Yesterday’s call of tears, with more confrontations, has driven me into a slight depression. If everyone feels that I’ve wronged them in some way, how can I remedy their inquiries, if I have no knowledge? Waiting four years is just a bit unfair.
So I blog my heart and soul, and let the crap go. If the phone rings tonight, I’m going to tell her to stop keeping score. I’m going to tell her that I’ve moved on. Depression is not a state I want to be in. I enjoy being positive and am willing to start anew with her. If that doesn’t work… then I’m moving on without her. No more keeping score!
Monday, August 17, 2009
There’s a tree with secret nook
Near the river where we fished
He would bait my every hook
As I played about and wished
That someday I’d know the song
He would sing to everything
That would let me play along
In the early part of spring
“Happy birthday Grandfather”
Sunday, August 16, 2009
On mountain green we watched the light
The sun arose with awesome flight
Across the snow, rays fell in lines
Creating trees that looked divine.
The sky was red, then turned to pinks
The fog did flirt with several winks
A line of green did peek and leave
A sight so rare I now believe
The bitter cold against my face
I longed returned to warmer place
I sketched the sky and then the sun
Included trees and I was done
Back in the home I brought my paint
Each element a sacred saint
When I was done the painting showed
An early sun and beauty glowed