Stripping away the rose colored glasses of denial concerning my reality. Getting in touch with truth. Reaching out to others in empathy concerning their reality and their walk to truth.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Whooo, did what?

First draft; only draft... letting my blogger pals know that my world feels a bit smaller. I'm just going to type whatever comes to mind and then leave it here. This too shall pass.

I think most of you know my husband and I are divorcing. That's okay, we weren't close for the past ten years. The hard part, the devastating part is looking at photos of the nieces and nephews I may never see again. That part of my family that came with him. Watching them all grow up and now hearing each having a child... so much loss... I have no words.

My own family is so at odds, it's ridiculous. Since my Dad's death, over a year ago, the greed has amazed me. I truly do not know my family. And I'm not surprised then that they don't know me. It's taken a great deal of prayers to keep me from not speaking too much of my mind. I'd rather not react in anger, but there are times I'm finding that a "bold word" is necessary.

Mostly I'm content. I've learned that reaching out to others brings me more joy than I already have. I went to my Godmother's home and helped her daughter begin the process of emptying it. My Godmother died about five months ago. I know too well about removing things of another. I asked my own God-daughter to come with me. Together we got this wonderful woman to begin a healing process; something she needed; something we felt that God sent us to assist with.

There's a person I'd like to get closer to... but it's like a dog chasing a car... LOL. What would I do if I caught it? Dogs can't drive. If I don't know enough, to venture out, then oops, I'd better rethink my actions. It would seem I'm getting older and more cautious.

I suppose 'southern women' would call my writing, "airing my dirty laundry"... but I know my blog pals. If there's any good advice they will step forward to lend a hand or offer good thoughts. It's a blessing to me.

Okay, that's enough for now; hopefully for a great while... at least two days!!!

Have a great weekend, everyone.

Dixie

2 comments:

  1. Hi Dixie,
    I have read your posting and I'm hoping that verbalising your feelings or okay, 'airing your dirty laundry', has given you a modicum of comfort as you move on, as best you can, to a more positive reality.
    You've been through so much, and for what it's worth, my dear friend, I wish you ongoing peace. May you a great weekend.
    In kindness and respect, Gary

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ahhh, Gary, how very nice of you.

    I hope your weekend brought you peace. Thanks so much.

    Kindness to you,
    Dixie

    ReplyDelete

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