Past experiences dominated my thinking. And in those good old days, I ran away! I don't know of any way to go back. It becomes one of those situations where you let the lesson speak.
This probably doesn't even make sense.
Have you ever convinced yourself (for example, give yourself about 10 reasons) 'why' you should avoid something or someone? Later on you might wonder, 'what' was the big deal? I'm guessing the big deal was my fear, but fear of what?