Stripping away the rose colored glasses of denial concerning my reality. Getting in touch with truth. Reaching out to others in empathy concerning their reality and their walk to truth.

Saturday, December 6, 2014

Thursday nights

image source

Cooking for a homeless shelter has blessings and challenges. I'll be there every Thursday from now through March, when the weather warms. I always feel a strange weight on my shoulders, that first night. It gets better!

I stood there gazing up at a moon - dancing with the clouds.
The cold night air made me shake and I felt sadness.
Only ten people - ten homeless people came to eat and find warmth.
Where were the others?

They fear being trapped by some authority.
They think - maybe someone will not let them freely leave.
So many stay away and feel safer in the cold - hungry - but safe.
Why do we fear them?

I listen to their chatter - quick banter  - and then sudden silence.
They're not ignorant - not stupid - not lowlife.
The circumstances differ and yet sound the same.
Where do they find the smiles they share?

In the bathroom lounge I choke back emotion - I feel what I don't want to feel.
I might find myself one, maybe two steps away from their life - their lot.
It terrifies me until I rejoin them in the dining hall.
What gives them courage to continue?

The moon is rising higher - tears freezing on my cheek.
Snuggled up cozy they sleep more peacefully than we - if we sleep at all.
One day a week from now though next March - this is their haven of rest.
Where will they go for the rest of the weeks - of days?

As I said above, it gets better. This year Christmas day is a Thursday - we will be rocking!

Frank Sinatra - Let it snow

Mariah Carey - All I want for Christmas is you

Band Aid - 1984 - Do they know it's Christmas?

Faith Hill - Where are you Christmas? (The Grinch)


  1. we can't even imagine how it is being totally homeless... We don't have many homeless centres here in my country, even kitchens for the poor have difficulties with funds.
    I do always have a fright of being or ending up homeless, and no matter how much money I manage to save up sometimes for bad days, the fear is always there. It is almost impossible getting a house loan or something like that, so if you do not have a family to inherit a house or a flat from.. fear of becoming homeless is a realistic one

    1. We have no concept here. We're only beginning to see those same difficulties but it's a rapid downshift. Food prices increased by 20% three weeks ago. To the ones who still live comfortably, it had little or no impact. Normally our Homeless shelter houses and feeds 70 people, but not enough funds to be open more than one day/night a week, and only during the coldest months. I feel certain that the time will come when private homes might be an answer to the other six days. So I research plans, small repairs, and try to get prepared. Not many people are going to do that - open their home to strangers... and that's their choice. Maybe they'll donate a casserole!
      Dezz - I just know that you're one of those people who smile at everyone you meet! I have concern for your area of the world and the sadness my world has brought yours. Heaven stop us. Thank you :)

    2. It is already amazing that you prepare food for them, but planning to open your house for them is truly a heroic act, Dixie!

    3. Heroic? Not if you saw their faces - you'd want someone to care. You'd do it because you'd want someone to care.

      Tonight is Grinch movie night. The laptop and I shall be laughing it up! :))

    4. I know exactly what you mean!

  2. Hey, I like your idea of connecting to music you like! Terrific idea ;-)
    Very many homeless people are well educated and often highly skilled - they just got the bad breaks.
    Listening to Dire Straights 'Money For Nothing' at:
    CLICK HERE for Bazza’s fabulous Blog ‘To Discover Ice’

    1. Bazza - I just got it! That's been your concept all along - this connecting to music. I just had one of those moments when I wanted to leave a little light for the soul. Ah! I feel stupid - what a brilliant idea you've had all along!

      You're so right about homeless ones - one was a former executive with a five star home - but his peacefulness was contagious. His wife and children were at another shelter - as we only admit males at this one. Unfortunately, we've had too many women that want to fight over a male. It prompted a hard decision.
      Thank you for Dire Straits! I relate. So when do we get to see what you've painted to this song? (smile)

  3. Replies
    1. BBC - such a unique way of saying - Bah, Humbug!(smile)

  4. Replies
    1. What a wonderful and pleasant surprise. That's a play list keeper if ever there was, Mr. Pilgrim!

  5. I am curious about what part of the world DEZMOND comes from. I can honestly say I have never thought of the possibility of being homeless. I so hope that it could never happen and I have every admiration for you Ivy, cooking for a shelter.

    1. Hi Jo. My friend, Dezmond is from Subotica, Vojvodina. His has a most amazing web site, called "Hollywood Spy." If you get a moment, go over and have a look at all of the interviews with him - he's quite an accomplished individual. Look at the bar across the top of the site. Do you want to know about cooking, decorating, website design, clothing, literary interpreter, etc., etc., etc.! A brilliant but very humble man.
      Ah, Jo - you're so kind. Go get some cookies and drop them off at an orphanage or shelter. The kids love it. They might not accept home-made for obvious reasons... but the kids will not care!!! Smile!

  6. Kudos to you Dixie...I cannoy say that I am as generous as you.....
    But.....I did go out and look at the moon as you suggested last night!
    Took a few pics....and this evening as well....
    Too bad I am not blogging right now :o(
    Dez is a great guy...isn't he?
    Enjoy your evening...
    Linda :o)

    1. Dear Linda - you really have no idea how much your blog home feeds us all! You have so much talent and you freely share it. For me it's like a peaceful haven, where I can come rest from thoughts.
      Enjoy your break. I know you'll return with thought-provoking goodies!
      Kudos and cheers to you friend!

    2. Oh my goodness....
      Thanks so much Dixie....
      At least you are missing me!
      Be back soon......

    3. I visit you every single day. I hoping I won't run out of your posts to read before you get back(smile). Your site is very relaxing. I can't wait to see what you're doing for a Christmas post. (Hopefully you are!)
      Take your time...

  7. I helped the homeless for years, until I got tired of helping bottom feeders. There are those that need help for a while and there are those that just milk the system while giving nothing back.

    1. that's odd, the bottom feeders speak very highly of you.

    2. BBC - Bless you for the time you were able to give.I understand what you're saying and the feelings.
      Not long ago, there came a time I had to make a choice. Was I helping for them or for me? It changes the slant. It no longer gives them control over our joy. We grab it and run with it, or let it go. There are so many other ways to be a giving individual.... you know that. I like the fact that no matter what - you are true to yourself.

    3. Hi Billy. I was hoping you'd bring another Christmas link. That last one was a kicker. I've played it six times...emailed it twice. :))

    4. I still help others a lot, I'm just selective about who I help.

    5. BBC- that's a wise decision! And it's really nice that you're able to help. :))

  8. Plus... it can happen to all of us. I forever fear being trapped by some authority, Dixie. I know I wasn't put on this planet to obey other people. Do you know what I mean?

    1. Absolutely. It is the unknown that feels threatening. Feelings can be changed. One moment of courage dissolves fear. An accumulation of moments brings joy. (Staying in the "now-now" awareness is a good thing.)

      Hope you are okay with my posting your "Sensitive Readers" button. Your image makes me smile - as does the cartoon picture. :))

  9. There are so many homeless on the streets around here at the moment. I always feel bad for them, but prefer to donate to the agencies that help them rather than handing cash directly to the people when they beg.

    1. Hi Kate. Nothing wrong with being safe. It's nice that you're able to help out. :))

  10. I really like you already.
    I feel the same, and I wrote a poem (posted on my blog several months ago) called Mere Chances. It expresses the same sentiment. "I stride into your eyes and see, I could be you. You could be me...", "mere chance contrasts each circumstance."
    This is part of the reason why the volunteer work feels so important and rewarding. Right?

    Many blessings to you.

    1. Oh my goodness - yes.
      I would like to read your poem - I'll come have a look. Thank you very much.
      I'm guessing it's time for my chocolate fix! Bless YOU, Robyn.


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