Stripping away the rose colored glasses of denial concerning my reality. Getting in touch with truth. Reaching out to others in empathy concerning their reality and their walk to truth.

Friday, December 18, 2009

Hi Mom

Today’s your birthday. I dedicate this blog to you.

In our home, birthdays were always simple; none of that egotistical celebration. You were a good Mom to teach me that the creature is not the same as the creator. At your knee I learned that I needed humility and kindness as traits to do service in the universe. I needed gratitude to keep my countenance in check. I needed love, and sense of fair play, lest I judge unwisely.

I remember that you questioned the untruths of December 25th, and wondered why the world was almost ‘mad’ with fervor; ignoring reason. When and where had the creator instituted such a holiday for celebration? Within, what you told me was His written word, there was no explanation. The only new holy day was “The Last Supper”; we were to do “that” in remembrance of the creator’s first and only begotten child. So what was Christmas?

Time has passed; indeed twelve years since you’ve been gone. Christmas has become quite the vexation; people irrationally judging each other by its ‘existence’. “It may not be his birthday, “as some say, “but it’s the day I choose to celebrate it.” I’m prompted to respond: get on with it then. Its not that I mind celebrating the light that entered the world because of the divine child; I mind when others, without authority, add on more ‘good news’ than is true. So I’m missing Christmas, but not as much as I miss you.

In the aftermath of loss, it becomes imperative to move on. Each person experiencing loss must choose the path that brings them relief. I’ll be mailing out your card today. I’ve never had one returned. Then again, if it had a ‘return address’ on it, I might. (LOL) Somewhere, someone will open that card and read about the light I miss, and the light that keeps me going. I trust the universe that it arrives in the right person’s hands. Silly, yes, but it’s my celebration of you.


  1. Thank you for a poignant blog, which I'm sure was hard to write or written twice over with tears. Thinking of you, love Julie xx

  2. Happy Birthday to our mother's.
    I'll be thinking of you today.
    Love L.R.

  3. Dear Dixie,
    A most thought provoking posting. The bond, that special connection you had with your Mother, shines through.
    My thoughts are with you at the poignant moment in your life.
    With great respect, Gary xx

  4. Dear "A jewel shining through"...Thanks. XX

  5. Hi Dixie
    Hmmm, I couldn't have said it better myself. How bitter sweet to send a card out to the infinite. I too hope someone deserving opens it. I also miss my Mom. Funny how the coolest memories will just pop up for seemingly no reason. My thoughts are with you and even though it is not His actual birthday, I pray you feel His blessings always.

  6. Dear Dixie,
    A most moving and poignant post.
    Mums (as we call them in England)certainly are very special people, and it is great that you remember yours in such a warm and moving way. Not silly at all, really, just a nice way of remembering your Mum.
    I also agree that we have to move on if we have experiened some form of loss. While not forgetting, we have to move on to survive, I think, allbeit that it is often a difficult and thorny path.
    Yours with Very Best Christmas and New Year Wishes,

  7. Heather: Yes, that's how it goes for now. Thanks XX

  8. David: Surviving, and where to use all of that displaced love?
    Thanks XX


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